Best parenting strategies that will help your child to succeed in life. Seek help from best parenting counsellors.

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 ‘The thing about Parenting rules are that there aren’t any. That’s what makes it so difficult’

Parenting is a tough job and yet an extremely essential one. This article intends to help parents ease out some pressure and apply some skills that can help raise emotionally healthy children.

Parenting practices around the world share three major goals: ensuring children’s health and safety, preparing children for life as productive adults and transmitting cultural values. A high-quality parent-child relationship is critical for healthy development.

Here I would like to quote a poem by Kahlil Gibran,

“Your children are not your children
They are the sons and daughters of life's longing for itself
They come through you but not from you
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you

You may give them your love but not your thoughts
For they have their own thoughts
You may house their bodies but not their souls
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow”

These lines reflect how essential it is to understand that we do not own or can control our children. They are separate individuals and have their own individual thought processes and creativity. They belong to a different generation.

Child Psychologists have identified certain Parenting Strategies that help one’s child succeed as well as become resilient individuals.

  1. Understand one’s Parenting Style: There are four parenting styles identified. Authoritarian Parents are often thought as disciplinarians, they use strict discipline style and communication is one way. It is often less nurturing and not very flexible. Permissive parenting mostly let children do what they want and offer very little guidance or direction. Expectations are little and communication is more open. Uninvolved parenting means when children get a lot of freedom and parents are less interested in the child. Communication is limited and neglect may occur. Authoritative parenting is the kind where parents are reasonable and nurturing, clear expectations are given. Communication is frequent and goals are stated clearly. Child counselors at Mpower recommend Authoritative parenting style the most as it is seen to be the most beneficial to a child. These children are most emotionally regulated, feel loved and are seen to be high achieving. They have higher self-esteem and are assertive in communication.
  2. Creating a schedule or Routine: It is very important that children have some routine and schedule. The pandemic caused many mental health concerns for children as schools were shut. Mood, sleep and appetite issues occurred. It is essential to have some activities scheduled for the child to do the entire day. This helps regulate the sleep cycle as well as the child experiences a sense of clarity.
  3. 3. Use of Reward System adequately: It is known that if a child is rewarded with praise or tangible rewards the occurrence of the desirable behavior increases. Thus, acknowledging their good behavior provides a feedback to the child hence the behavior increases. Rewards could be praise, tokens, field trips, chocolates, desired food and so on.
  4. Modelling: A child learns a lot from imitating. Children pick up a lot of skills and behaviors through observation. Parents displaying behaviors such as effective communication, problem solving skills, emotional regulation is reflected on the child. Children from abusive and conflicting environments are emotionally dysregulated.
  5. Let children decide: Involving children in decision making process by taking their suggestions and opinions on various choices can be facilitating. These could be choice of clothes, restaurants, picnics etc. Giving them some responsibility can also increase a sense of self belief and esteem.
  6. Setting time outs and constructive punishment: Children can benefit from punishments that are constructive such as time outs as well as giving them responsible tasks to do for bad behavior.
  7. Giving them ample play time: It is extremely essential for children to play. At times, boredom can lead to creative play. Parents do not need to entertain children all the time. It is observed that children tend to find creativity and novel ideas during boredom. Facilitating peer groups and socialization is beneficial.
  8. Creating a validating home environment. This means a safe space for children to express needs, emotions and thoughts. A space where parents are accepting and non-judgmental of children.
  9. Seeking for professional help: Children are susceptible to mental health conditions. It is very important for parents to seek the right guidance and help. Mpowerminds is one such mental health clinic in India offering best counselling services from child psychologists, psychiatrists and other professionals. Mpower offer mental health services in Mumbai, Bangalore and Kolkata.

Parenting may seem like a mammoth task, however with the right tools and strategies we can make it simpler. The best way to make children good is to make them happy.

Also read- What constitutes a comprehensive and integrated child development. Find a child psychologist/child psychiatrist in near you- https://mpowerminds.com/blog/What-constitutes-a-comprehensive-and-integrated-child-development-Find-a-child-psychologistchild-psychiatrist-in-Bangalore

How does over-parenting affects your child’s mental health? https://mpowerminds.com/blog/How-over-parenting-affects-your-childs-mental-health

Author
Nikita Sulay
Psychologist and Outreach Associate: Mpower – The Foundation
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